Hey, Trust Tree family, we're shaking off the cobwebs of a brief pause with a return to the mic that promises to deliver more than your average news feed. Imagine us as your audacious caddies, guiding you through the fairways of conversation, from the meticulous world of tennis investment to the peculiarities of kosher cuisine. Our bald beacon of wisdom, Zeke, and the ever-quirky Tater are teeing up tales from our latest golfing shenanigans to a Shark Tank-style pitch that's sure to ruffle some feathers.
Strap in for a swing around the globe as we chase the little white ball from the clay courts of the French Open to the windswept greens of Robson Ranch. We'll navigate through the thrills of watching tennis prodigies take on legends, our personal encounters with the sport, and the unexpected life lessons gleaned from the back nine. And because we're not one to shy away from the offbeat, brace yourself for an oddball story about a chance encounter with none other than Jake Gyllenhaal—yes, you read that right.
Bringing it home, we're getting up close and personal with the scandals and stories that tailgate the stars of sports, like Shohei Ohtani's interpreter's headline-making antics. Discover our hot takes on the Dallas Stars' icy issues, and join us for a chat about the simple joy of farm-fresh produce amidst wedding vows. It's an episode loaded with laughs, debates, and the type of audible chaos that only comes when this group of fools gets their hands on the microphone. So, what are you waiting for? Hit play and let's roll.
Hey, Trust Tree family, we're shaking off the cobwebs of a brief pause with a return to the mic that promises to deliver more than your average news feed. Imagine us as your audacious caddies, guiding you through the fairways of conversation, from the meticulous world of tennis investment to the peculiarities of kosher cuisine. Our bald beacon of wisdom, Zeke, and the ever-quirky Tater are teeing up tales from our latest golfing shenanigans to a Shark Tank-style pitch that's sure to ruffle some feathers.
Strap in for a swing around the globe as we chase the little white ball from the clay courts of the French Open to the windswept greens of Robson Ranch. We'll navigate through the thrills of watching tennis prodigies take on legends, our personal encounters with the sport, and the unexpected life lessons gleaned from the back nine. And because we're not one to shy away from the offbeat, brace yourself for an oddball story about a chance encounter with none other than Jake Gyllenhaal—yes, you read that right.
Bringing it home, we're getting up close and personal with the scandals and stories that tailgate the stars of sports, like Shohei Ohtani's interpreter's headline-making antics. Discover our hot takes on the Dallas Stars' icy issues, and join us for a chat about the simple joy of farm-fresh produce amidst wedding vows. It's an episode loaded with laughs, debates, and the type of audible chaos that only comes when this group of fools gets their hands on the microphone. So, what are you waiting for? Hit play and let's roll.
Okay, hello everyone. Welcome to another episode of the Trust Tree. We've been off for a while. There's no getting around that and it's not something that we're proud of, but we'll try to be better moving forward. No guarantee on that. I'm here today with Alexander Alex. Hello, hello, hello. Zeke is also here. Hello, it's me. Still bald. Yeah, he's still bald, and that voice that you heard rudely interrupting is Tater. Tater. Welcome to the pod. Hello, ben. Thanks, we've got some pretty important things that we need to cover. We were considering retiring from podcasting entirely, but there were too many important things that weren't getting covered correctly. That's so true In the traditional news. So here we all are. Non-traditional traditional news that's that's our category. Yeah, not traditional news that's what subject under apple? If you go into apple podcasts and you look through the categories, we're under non-traditional okay borderline falsehoods unchecked, fact-checked words non-traditional just means wrong bad news, but it's not opinions.
Speaker 1:We're not. We're not here to share opinions, we're just these are cold hard facts, facts that are opinions.
Speaker 2:We're not, we're not here to share opinions.
Speaker 1:These are cold hard facts, facts that are lies we're going to talk about today. We're going to talk about whether or not we got better or worse. Um, I think we're three weeks from the last pod, maybe even four, so it's a lot since we recorded it, yeah there's a lot of data in between.
Speaker 2:It sat in the hopper for a while. It was such a hot, hot podcast we didn't know if we could actually put it out. That's's really what took so long we were getting clearance from the government.
Speaker 1:Exactly Turns out, it was just barely safe.
Speaker 3:They just told us to shut up.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they were very dismissive. We kept asking them for a response and they kept not giving us one because they didn't need to.
Speaker 1:Not a fan of Biden's America. I'll just say that right there. How come it takes so long for us to get a podcast approved?
Speaker 3:through Congress. Well, you just made us a political podcast.
Speaker 2:Now Ben's been doing this weeks in a row. Now he always wants to talk about Russia. Tough week to talk about Russia.
Speaker 1:I'm not talking about Russia today. Zeke Alex and I, prior to this podcast, played golf. We're going to talk about our worst hole of golf. Then, of course, we'll have the X-Files. We'll consider talking about analytics and kind of, with analytics, we might have to visit the subject of whether or not Jake Ondra sucks. We just do the same.
Speaker 1:That's a concept, a hot topic Zeke has brought a puzzler for us. We might even start there on Zeke's puzzler. Then we're going to play in the range of Shark Tank, I think, where everyone here, for sure Tater, is going to try to sell us on something that he likes, that we do not currently like. Zeke likes it. Zeke's going to be my. Tater is electing to not play by the rules.
Speaker 2:I've planted. It's like he's a plant, zeke is a plant in my scheme to convince you guys. You shouldn't have said anything, so then I could just be like, oh, you're right, I will watch tennis.
Speaker 1:Now I think we're going to start with Zeke's puzzler. Zeke, why don't you, why don't you mind bending question? You've been.
Speaker 2:America's been waiting for something I saw and it's. Let me help you out.
Speaker 1:You're going to want to anything interesting like this. You're going to want to pretend like it's original content. Okay, so I was.
Speaker 2:This is non-traditional news after all the bear is white. It's in North Pole. I was doing my daily meditation while I was driving to work is that an eyes closed or eyes open? Eyes open, but no music and no nothing. Radio off. I was just thinking to myself. I was wondering, and you all can give your takes on it or your thoughts, but if people are born 100% deaf, what language do they think in Original Latin? Next question Original Latin as opposed to like new age Latin yeah.
Speaker 3:It's a dead language.
Speaker 2:Not for deaf people.
Speaker 1:The revived of latin is what they think I think, non-traditional english, not traditionally. What is non-traditional english actually?
Speaker 2:I think it's. I think like the legitimate answer is like written words, yeah, but written words come in all sorts of different languages as well, whatever.
Speaker 1:Whatever language they learn to read in, that's what they think like until they learn to read. Yeah, but written words come in all sorts of different languages as well, whatever, whatever language they learn to read in that's what they think like until they learn to read they just don't think at all.
Speaker 2:I mean, until babies learn to talk, or what are they thinking?
Speaker 1:a lot of times they're thinking will you please change my poop right? Could I have some milk or avocado?
Speaker 2:or avocado. So you see something like, literally, that's a fair question like what is, what is your child thinking? It thinking right now, in what language? Because it doesn't know a language yet there are.
Speaker 1:Well, I think she does know english. She knows some english words, and I don't how old is she?
Speaker 2:she's gonna be six months you think she knows english words? Yeah, she recognizes some for sure. Okay, like what words that?
Speaker 1:they use all the time. She knows mom a lot. Okay, you can tell, because some of them are like, hey, daisy, do you want to see your mom? And then her eyes light up. She's like give me a way through. Too bad, you're hanging out with your dad and then she'll start crying. Okay, fair Zeke, what's your opinion?
Speaker 3:This I thought I would ask my friends Shapes and colors, or like, do they just think they just relate everything to?
Speaker 2:shapes and colors.
Speaker 3:Maybe Like how could we know?
Speaker 1:I almost said this is bad. Actually I'm not going to say that Wow, Actually I am. I was going to say that. I almost said that if anyone that's deaf listens to this podcast, if they could just know the answer to the answer. But that's not the right question.
Speaker 2:Do they think in? Do they think in braille? I mean maybe, how could we possibly?
Speaker 1:know that's actually for blind people.
Speaker 2:I think that's going to be. I mean maybe, though Probably not, that it's possible. I bet some people I can see Can read braille Okay.
Speaker 1:Okay. Well, there's a lot of awkward signs here, zeke. What I think I'm hearing is we don't know the answer.
Speaker 2:First of all, I don't think it's awkward signs. I think it's more pondering.
Speaker 3:I think it's an interesting question, because do you all have an inner monologue? When you're thinking, are you talking to yourself? What do you think? There are some people that don't think like that. Oh, I don't think that way.
Speaker 2:Do think like that. Oh, I don't think that way. Do you just think in shapes and colors? Wait, how do you think then? Because this is the wrong way to do it.
Speaker 1:first of all, I don't have an inner monologue, but Morgan Freeman is narrating what's going on. Alright as a joke. No, it's not a joke, I think in Morgan Freeman. Why do you think?
Speaker 2:I'm so calm, that's how I describe you. I do. Why do you think I'm so calm? That's how I describe you? I do, but like bennett, so you're having, you're telling yourself like full english sentences yes, yeah, okay, same are they? Run on sentences, oh yeah constantly yeah or incomplete sentences too semicolons.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'd be guilty of that as well. Um, okay, well, I think we pretty much settled that yeah, that was good.
Speaker 3:Thank you for that, but where do you like what's your aunt? Do you like what's your best guess?
Speaker 2:Like I don't know, like I can't come up with anything. That's why I thought I would ask you. You have no answer to the question I have no idea. Wow, that big of a brain, that big of a head with that big of a brain and no answer to this question.
Speaker 3:Your pondering meditation needs some work question you're pondering. Meditation needs some work. Look my, my puzzler is sore. So you stumped yourself, is what you're saying? I only think of questions.
Speaker 1:Cool man. Um well, some others that we have to cover today. Um, alex, I'm gonna throw to you for your segment. Why don't you explain to everybody what you're thinking here, set us up and then you know. We know that tater's the first one in the ether yeah.
Speaker 3:so tater constantly tries to convince us that tennis is super cool and sick. It's not, but I wanted him to put together a business case sort of and present it to us and then we can all bid our percentage interest Like Shark Tank. Yes, you're obviously trying to buy 100% of all of our interests. Right your attention, it's an attention economy out there.
Speaker 2:Exactly. I don't know if you all are aware of that, but that's kind of no, I knew that. Okay, so what I was thinking? And I've been on a tennis kick recently because I've been playing tennis, I've been watching tennis and I know that this is a golf group. You guys like playing golf and watching golf, right, and golf is in a bad spot currently because people are going to live whatever. For the record, golf has literally never had more money than it does right now, I mean, but entertainment-wise it's in a bad spot.
Speaker 3:Bad vibes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, like all the best players are not playing at the same time right now.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they are. They're all playing on live and it is called electric.
Speaker 2:It is golf, but louder Okay. All right, that's my point. So loud Okay, but in a time where there's three golf guys here that are watching a shitty version of golf, where it's not as cool as it used to be A shitty version of golf.
Speaker 2:Shittier than it used to be. For sure, it's better than you. I'm here to make the case, no, I know, but I'm saying it's been better to watch in the past, yes or no? Well, yeah, but Tiger, that's just Tiger. Oh my God, I'm talking to make a case for you don't have to watch tennis every week. I'm not saying do that, because a lot of times tennis isn't the same spot where, like, djokovic isn't playing this week in Miami. But I'm just trying to convince you all to give the four majors a chance. That's my baseline.
Speaker 3:The Grand Slams, if you will.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's four weeks. Every Grand Slam is two weeks long. Oh my god, you don't have to watch the first week, just watch the second week, because there are characters that are on the rise here. So everybody knows Djokovic, nadal, federer, all those guys, right, andy Roddick.
Speaker 1:Andy Roddick. I guess if you want to put him in the top four, that's who I know?
Speaker 2:Okay, you know, andy Roddick, yes, okay, okay, you know Andy Roddick, yes, okay, all right, so you don't know who Federer is.
Speaker 3:Yeah, the people.
Speaker 2:You, that's who I know. Okay, yes, I'm telling you, the next generation of that type of player is coming now From America.
Speaker 1:Yeah, is there.
Speaker 2:America.
Speaker 3:Not really. Okay, well, I'm not.
Speaker 2:USA Making it political again. I respect that, but I'm saying like if you can get on the ground Look, daisy's locked in you can get in on the ground floor of the next generation of great tennis players now and watch them while.
Speaker 1:Djokovic is still playing. What does that do for me?
Speaker 2:It means you get to watch like Djokovic, in my opinion, one of the biggest assholes. I'm saying get to. Yeah, it's an art I was going to say get to. Yeah, it's an art, you don't have to. I'm saying like, but you get to watch this. These guys like have the potential. Yannick Sinner is one of them, of course.
Speaker 2:Carlos Alcaraz is the other one. And also Daniil Medvedev is like one of the best villains in professional sports, I think, because he like Where's he from? Mother Russia Also, if mother russia, also, if you watch tennis right now, all the russians, they don't put their flags on the tv, it's just they're. They're. Everybody like has their own flag, but the russians don't. Anyway, these are the four guys that like if you start watching now and you watch during the majors, like the second week of the majors, you're gonna get to watch these guys and they're like they're just animals and like it's like the most entertaining shit and you guys, I feel like you guys could really get in on the ground floor of the next group of people that's going to win a fuckload of majors.
Speaker 2:It's like watching the passing of the torch.
Speaker 1:Can I make? Yeah, I just kind of want to make sure I kind of am picking up where you're laying down here, so let me read it back to you. There are these guys that are really good at tennis, that we know about, the guys you listed at the beginning know about the guys you listed at the beginning the old guys, the guys that were good when we were in high school, the Mohicans.
Speaker 2:Exactly, they've retired Federer, retired Nadal's on his way out. He keeps getting injured. Djokovic is still here.
Speaker 3:That's the thing.
Speaker 2:Djokovic is like Andy Murray's, still playing too. Andy Murray's not my jam, but if you want to watch somebody be really whiny a British guy be really whiny, sure you can watch Andy Rock, but I'm here, for Djokovic is still here. That's what I'm saying. He's still like winning tournaments. He won two majors last year, so you can watch these guys try and take the mantle from him and then when Djokovic is gone, they're going to run shit for a decade.
Speaker 1:So so I just have to get to know new tennis players.
Speaker 2:No, there's two new tennis players. You weren't even listening.
Speaker 1:I have to get to know them.
Speaker 2:No, you get to watch them win tennis matches.
Speaker 1:Are they winning them?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Is Djokovic winning them?
Speaker 2:He won. Yeah, If there's so many people being passed around.
Speaker 1:Is it even competitive? Oh my god.
Speaker 2:Only one person gets to win the tournament.
Speaker 1:Okay, well, let me pivot a little bit. Why is watching tennis interesting?
Speaker 2:It's so great. These guys are so fucking good at tennis. They hit the ball so hard. They're so athletic, they're just changing the game every day.
Speaker 1:In what way?
Speaker 2:They win points in a way that I've never seen anybody win points. They play the big points better than everyone. They're mental machines, they're physical behemoths. Will they be playing tennis better than everyone? They're mental machines, they're physical behemoths.
Speaker 1:Will they be playing tennis on different size tennis courts, like how some golf holes are different? No, no, it'll be the same.
Speaker 2:Well, the services will be different. They'll be playing on clay grass, hard courts, as they do every year. Those dynamics will never change. The players who are winning the tournaments I'm telling you it's time now to get in On the ground floor. Players who are winning the tournaments I'm telling you it's time now to to get in on the ground floor. So for this, I'm asking for a million dollars for a 1% investment in my company.
Speaker 1:Can I ask you a question? Are they, are any of these guys going to be better than Federer, Like I?
Speaker 2:it's possible. It's very possible. Yes, based on what Carlos Alvarez is, 20, and he's already won two majors.
Speaker 1:How many did Federer win at that age?
Speaker 2:I don't know these stats, okay, but I'm telling you.
Speaker 1:Normally, when you make a pitch, you kind of have this stuff. Oh, okay, yeah, I didn't you have these numbers ready.
Speaker 3:How many stores are you in? How many orders do you have?
Speaker 2:Yeah, okay, I didn't do any preparation for this other than just saying like I've been watching tennis and it's pretty sick, all right.
Speaker 3:Well, let me butt in here. You have 20% of my attention. And that's just because I really like tennis clips where they're yelling at the ref.
Speaker 2:Okay, that is Medvedev. Okay, I like that. He's a Russian guy. He's like mocking players while he's playing.
Speaker 3:I like watching the ball people. I I'm not going to assign a gender to them, but the ball people either getting drilled or doing something silly or doing something sick Like sneaky athletic yeah. So how do you get me from minor clip watching to watching a full match?
Speaker 2:I guess you guys just have to like the sport of tennis more than you do. How can I like it more? You should go play it. I'll play it with you.
Speaker 3:That sounds horrible for me, though you played it for a long time.
Speaker 2:No, but I'll just hit the ball with you If you play a little bit. He says that now I do that with Tater. Sometimes he's come over to my apartment a few times. We just go to the tennis court, that's there and we just hit balls for an hour.
Speaker 1:Okay, so this is really just a way for you to insert in a conversation that you live at a tennis court.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's so nice Like you have your own. What?
Speaker 3:Like you have your own.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we don't have a living room in our apartment, we just have a tennis court.
Speaker 1:That's sweet, it's more of an arena. You got me on that. I'm in on that. How much to get a steak in the living room tennis court? That I'm in on.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I want to see some pro-am matches and a celebrity's dining hall.
Speaker 2:Okay, I'll work on that. I'll talk to my people and see if I can get that going. I actually think that's my entry point to tennis, so let me know when that's on TV, because until then, that's when live tennis gets better. Okay, all right, let me back it off. You don't have to watch a week of tennis. I just want everybody to watch one Grand Slam final this year.
Speaker 1:Oh, I've done that. Are you entertained by it? Yeah, it's fine. I mean, they are doing the same thing over and over again.
Speaker 2:What don't you like about it, says the guy who watches golf.
Speaker 1:I know, but golf has different lies, different shot shapes, all that kind of stuff, and I know tennis has that also.
Speaker 2:Yes, it does, but there's only so many of them that are available.
Speaker 3:And a lot of times the skill difference.
Speaker 1:Like the good guys just kick the shit out of the bad guys.
Speaker 2:I mean the difference between, like, the top players and the bad players is getting much smaller every day.
Speaker 1:So they're not as good as they used to be.
Speaker 2:No, everybody else is getting better.
Speaker 1:Okay, interesting. The floor is getting higher.
Speaker 2:The ceiling is not getting lower.
Speaker 3:Yes, exactly, the ceiling is getting higher too. I have one more question how long is one match in a Grand Slam final, or how long am I sitting there watching the Grand Slam?
Speaker 2:final is probably it varies from three to four hours but you can't. But yeah, that's just a one one v one match. Yes, I'm telling you, it's like it turns into like mental warfare, like if you go back and watch, like some of the like djokovic, federer, nadal, like grand slam finals, you have to win three sets. It's three out of five sets. Set goes to six games. Uh, four points wins a game if you have to win by two. So there's no. It's like baseball, where there's no time, which is a there's no clock, which is a detriment to tennis. But also like it turns into like the pressure builds like the longer the match goes on. So if you start at the beginning and stick with it through the end, I promise you by the end you'll be glad you did.
Speaker 3:Okay. You haven't got me to 100 just because three to four hours from one match is kind of a long time.
Speaker 2:But like the Wimbledon finals, like in the morning, it's like the British Open.
Speaker 3:So, like you can, kind of just watch it while I'm pretending to work.
Speaker 2:Yes, exactly.
Speaker 3:Literally yes, Well, it's on.
Speaker 2:Sunday, so you want to be working anyway. Yeah, it's true.
Speaker 1:But Alex is committed to his role. On Sundays he gets ready for work.
Speaker 2:He pretends to get ready for work on Sunday morning.
Speaker 1:He spends the entirety of his Sunday morning, so I just watch it while I pretend to work you got me like 65% just think about it and I'll try and find some clips for you guys.
Speaker 2:When's the next Grand Slam? It's in May. It's the French. I'll watch the final. Yeah, zeke, I will.
Speaker 1:Yannick Sinner just won on Australian. It was his first final.
Speaker 2:I mean I'll watch the final. Yeah, zeke, I will when the next one's in May. Yeah, yannick Sinner just won on Australian. It was his first final. The guy is on a rocket ship.
Speaker 3:But a sinner, I'm only watching a clay final, though.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's the next one. Okay, so Alcaraz will probably be in it, because the Spanish love clay. Well, there'll be beers there, at the open, at the final, or where we watch it At the watch party. Sure, I'll get beers.
Speaker 3:I'm there, brother.
Speaker 2:All right, love beer? All right. So it sounds like everybody is a 100% tennis fan. Now I've done my job. Thanks guys. Thanks for your time. Okay, not traditional news.
Speaker 1:Thanks for that, I think. I think it's probably time to go to the way we kick off most of these shows, which is figuring out if everyone is better or worse than the last time that we recorded the podcast. Now it's important to remember a whole month has passed since the last time that we recorded, so it's a lot of data. I don't need a week by week, like, hey, I got a little bit of this week, but there's some big rocks. Just a month of March, yeah, just like. How'd you do in the month of March? And I'm going to start with Zeke.
Speaker 2:I'd say I got 3% better this month. Wow, wow.
Speaker 3:You're a 27-9 pace, but it's good 1% better every day.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean I didn't. It wasn't a whole, but I did volunteer two weeks in a row to travel for work, to go work on sites that I knew were just going to be completely shitty. That's very. Yeah, I mean it was getting paid. I was like I'm going to go do this so the people that work for me don't have to go do this Interesting. I thought that was very kind of me, it's brave for sure.
Speaker 3:What were the locations of those jobs? One was in Austin.
Speaker 2:One was in Houston. Actually, I had to go to Houston for a week, so I'm going to say it was 5% better.
Speaker 3:One was in Cabo and one was in Malibu. I knew there were going to be terrible jobs, but I fell on the sword and took those trips for the team. It's cool to see that Actually better or worse?
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, honestly not enough evidence for me. Okay, I also don't think outside of work. I haven't ordered food at all, probably less than for my. Spending my own money. I probably ordered food less than five times this month. That's huge.
Speaker 3:That's big.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I agree. I agree with you 3% better than.
Speaker 2:Because I got a car this month also. Oh yeah, got a couple of new car, guys. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Zeke and I. It's called Zeke and Ben's Shared Prosperity.
Speaker 2:Wow, the trickle-down economics, I call it which was one of the best economic ideas ever. Way to go, Ron.
Speaker 1:You nailed that. That's what turned America into the thriving metropolis.
Speaker 2:Ben buys a car. Zeke gets a car from buying Ben's old car.
Speaker 1:I'd like to see that.
Speaker 2:You'd love to see it Zeke's mobile as hell now. Yes, zeke is mobile. I did drive myself here. It's cool to see it Zeke's mobile as hell now. Yes, zeke is mobile, I did drive myself here.
Speaker 1:It's cool to see that Sick brag. I know, alex, did you get better or worse in the last month?
Speaker 3:I'd say just a little bit better. March was a little debaucherous for me. Yeah, I went to a bachelor party in Cancun and that just really set me back probably six months of getting better. It's like the movie Babylon. It was more like Benjamin Button. Oh wow, yeah.
Speaker 2:Child in Cancun.
Speaker 3:Not a good place for a child.
Speaker 1:No, not safe, not safe.
Speaker 3:Let's see, there was about a week and a half where I cooked every meal. That was good. I hated every bit of it Because the food was bad. No.
Speaker 2:I just really like ordering food, that's fair.
Speaker 3:I like when people bring me food. I like scanning through menus. You know yelling at Uber Eats because they didn't get it there fast enough. It's real fair points. They do it a lot.
Speaker 1:Sleep schedule got better, my mold lava cake was hard by the time I got here.
Speaker 3:It was not lava at all, dude, the cake is lava, it was just hardened obsidian.
Speaker 1:Obsidian reference. I didn't see that coming on this podcast.
Speaker 3:I've been watching a lot of Obsidian crafting on YouTube lately. What does that look like? Oh, it's just a guy who cuts away at an Obsidian rock and he's like look, I made a bird. And it's like that's just a jagged square.
Speaker 2:How did I do? You're like I was like bad again Dislike. I'm going to keep watching. Maybe this guy's gonna get better. He's like is he getting one percent better? He just sees it in everybody in the world.
Speaker 1:Uh, obsidian rock carving has never been better.
Speaker 2:It's like tennis yeah, oh, it's on the rise, for, oh my gosh, yeah, get on the ground floor.
Speaker 3:Yeah, exactly, um, let's see where else did I maybe improve? Um, I'm putting a little more than a an hour of work into my work day. Every day I usually averaging an hour and now I'm probably like hour and a half, two hours maybe that's efficient yeah that's, that's well, I don't know if it's efficient. It's just like I'm trying a lot harder to pretend like I'm busy.
Speaker 2:Oh my, god, this is the worst way to do work. I hate work like that. It sucks, it's not good, it doesn't sound fulfilling at all.
Speaker 3:But yeah, I got a little bit better. I'll go 3% with.
Speaker 1:Zeke, I'm going to call a foul here. To me it sounds like you got worse. Yeah, you can't lead with like. I spent this debaucherous week in Cancun. It set me back so far, and then you expect me at the end of that to like count up all the, to do all the stuff, and you're better at the end of that.
Speaker 2:Yes, but he cooked a ton, true, alright.
Speaker 3:I tried to rid myself of Cancun, that's an unverified.
Speaker 2:You cleansed by not. You were like I need to do something. You sensed the percentages. You were getting worse and you reacted to that?
Speaker 3:Yeah, exactly, and it was fully organic that week and a half. That's how committed I was to getting all that out of my body. That's impressive.
Speaker 1:He's just eating organic hot dogs every night he's like damn it, Alex, you did it again. Love loopholes? I don't know, there's no way, it's a lie. Is Hebrew National, just completely clean.
Speaker 2:Interesting. I'd have to ask my sources. I'd have to tap into the underground is kosher clean.
Speaker 1:Uh, it's not organic. Kosher is like there's certain there are requirements for kosher food, but kosher and organic are not the same thing I thought you just have to like bless it I don't think that's right. I don't think that's right because I think, like bacon is not kosher and I don don't think blessing it makes it kosher. There are certain things.
Speaker 2:There's nothing you can do to pork, to make it kosher.
Speaker 1:Who's on the kosher?
Speaker 3:committee? Who's getting to decide this? I mean fair question.
Speaker 1:Fair question, but the koshers are. There are people that make these decisions. I think it was a legitimate set of rules. Unfortunately, none of us have a computer that we can use in our hand to figure out what the rules are for kosher, but I'll google the lords of dill, kosher, dill, the kosher rules just whatever john kosher decides, isn't it, dude?
Speaker 2:I was speaking of blessing food. Every time we go to see his grandparents they say grace and I always start eating before they bless the food, like literally last time I was over there. I was, I was over there, I had a full chicken tender in my mouth and her grandma was like Well, go on. I was like Damn sorry.
Speaker 3:Sorry, I've been a heathen for a long time.
Speaker 1:You can't eat meat and dairy together. It's not kosher to eat meat and dairy together.
Speaker 2:Chews its cud and has split hooves.
Speaker 1:Cows sheep, goats and deer are kosher. Chicken duck and turkey are kosher. Has both fins and scales, so it looks like most fish is kosher.
Speaker 3:So it's everything.
Speaker 1:Except for bacon. No, you can't eat pigs, rabbits, kangaroo. No scavenger or predatory birds. You can't have any crustaceans.
Speaker 2:No shrimp, no shrimp, no lobster.
Speaker 1:You can't have meat and dairy together. There's some weird rules about cows you can eat the chuck, the rib and the shoulder, but you can't eat the loin. No loin, no sirloin.
Speaker 2:Anything in the back half of the cow looks like a big no-no. So you're saying I can't eat my burnt end cereal for breakfast. No, you cango.
Speaker 3:So you're saying I can't eat my burnt end cereal for breakfast Gross. So how many rings of hell have I descended for butter basting my steak?
Speaker 1:Oh, it's a lot dude, honestly, you're lucky you still be here. Totally un-kosher.
Speaker 2:You might get smited at any moment.
Speaker 1:There is a smiting waiting.
Speaker 2:And that's, honestly, the only way to do it. I regret nothing alive, alex.
Speaker 1:Alex regrets nothing. It's cool to see that Tater Better or worse Than last month. I think I have to have gone worse.
Speaker 2:I just have. I've just been Waking up late, you know, feeling like overall Just generally lazy no, not noon, but like you know, just kind of like Hitting the snooze Button a ton. But honestly it's been pretty relaxing. So I don't you seem very relaxed.
Speaker 1:Thank you, yeah, very like I feel pretty Zen about it but also like I have no direction in my life, I feel really good about it. Yeah, exactly, have you still been?
Speaker 2:droning Off and on. I wouldn't say consistently You're still not drinking. I'm still not drinking.
Speaker 1:That's the one thing I have stuck with A whole year no beers.
Speaker 2:I don't know, a whole year of no, I mean, but like now that feels a little played out to keep bringing that back up, so like I don't know if that's getting better.
Speaker 1:Yeah, now you just don't drink anymore, yeah, and so if you start drinking again, then you can't get any more credit for not drinking, right? But the moment that you have that first beer, we will crucify you, right?
Speaker 2:yeah, and then like we took a break from good movies. Literally watched so many good movies.
Speaker 1:Have you started watching tennis? It's really interesting.
Speaker 2:Dude, I've been watching so much tennis. I'm like, damn, Is this coaching change for Jessica Pegula really the right move or not? I don't know. Let's see. I'm like, oh, then her coach started coaching Maria Zachary and Maria Zachary immediately gets to a final. Was that the right move for him? I don't know. It's been crazy. I've been watching a ton of movies. What's your favorite?
Speaker 1:What's the best movie you've watched.
Speaker 2:I watched this Jake Gyllenhaal movie called Enemy, is that?
Speaker 3:where he's a journalist. No, it's Nightcrawler.
Speaker 2:That's a crazy movie too, though Sierra really likes Jake Gyllenhaal movies. Almost an uncomfortable amount.
Speaker 1:Let's go watch that Jake Gyllenhaal movie. I don't want to watch it oh.
Speaker 3:I have a hilarious Jake Gyllenhaal story.
Speaker 2:I like hilarious Jake Gyllenhaal stories. Go ahead.
Speaker 3:Well, y'all might have seen it but Roan from Barstool was in a bathroom and he was like washing his hands and Jake Gyllenhaal walks in the bathroom and steps up to the urinal and pulls out like a little address book, like a little like count, like planner, and just like dumps a bag of coconut and just doesn't even line up, just snorts it out of the address book and like Roan's trying to make it like a really long time, him drying his hands and Jake comes up. He's like tell her if you want, they're never going to believe you. That is awesome. Whoever you want, they're never going to believe you. That is awesome.
Speaker 1:He's my favorite actor.
Speaker 2:That actually fits with.
Speaker 1:Did that happen in Cancun while you were there? Yeah, he was actually in Cancun with Rome. Alex actually did it, yeah.
Speaker 2:Damn, that's crazy. Jake Gyllenhaal, though he makes great movies. Anyway, enemy is like the super freaky. It's like a I don't know. I guess it's a thriller, but basically there's two jake gyllenhaals and like one guy. It's like kind of fight clubby, but different. I don't want to give a. I'll give it away if you guys want me to, but basically, like, do you guys want me?
Speaker 1:to don't forget you have to put a spoiler for whatever this spoiler warning enemy.
Speaker 2:The movie's old In the description of the podcast. I'm not going to be doing that. Turn it off if you don't want to hear about the enemy. But basically he's like his wife is pregnant and then he also has a mistress. But the two versions of like the movie is telling you that they're two different people, but they're actually. It's actually both the same Jake Gyllenhaal, and it's like his different person.
Speaker 2:He has like split personalities about like yeah, like when he's with his wife and then when he's with his mistress and then like that's basically the premise of the movie. It's exactly like it's like Fight Club, but less like fighting right it's just Jake Gyllenhaal, the fighting in the club.
Speaker 2:He's not really like creating a club of people or fighting at all, but he does have split personalities like that. And also, dune 2 is the other one, and I saw Ironclaw. You guys ever seen Ironclaw? Did you guys hear that? It's like the wrestling movie with the Von Erichs I heard it was sad, super sad, like really depressing. Yeah, very, very depressing, but a great movie. Um, if you want to be like sad and depressed and be like, wow, people are really fucked up to their kids sometimes, um, that's what that movie's about. Okay, so all that to say you got worse, yeah, definitely, definitely, yeah, yeah, but I feel great, I got bet.
Speaker 1:I I feel better, but I definitely got less responsible exactly.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the sacrifice like being productive for feeling good.
Speaker 3:Maybe we need to rethink this whole 1% better then.
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly, it sounds like tater got better is what it sounds like to me. This guy's doing nothing but sitting on his couch ordering DoorDash and watching TV.
Speaker 2:Well, I actually am going to the store, but I'm just eating frozen eggos.
Speaker 3:Frozen eggos are delightful, or a bowl of cereal.
Speaker 2:so you've just been nurturing your soul this past month your output got worse, but your soul got better like spring break was this week, or it was two weeks ago or a week ago, and I just I took the whole week off because Sierra was off. And then, like I was like, ah, I have some stuff I should really do this week. Didn't do any of it, just watched a bunch of movies Like it was pretty fucking sick. That was a problem for future Tater yeah exactly Like I should really file my taxes Nah watch another movie.
Speaker 3:You should file your taxes.
Speaker 2:You're running out of time. Noticed that. I think they'll be pretty cool.
Speaker 1:Considering they're doing tax fraud.
Speaker 2:What if I just ask them to be chill about it? Come on man.
Speaker 1:Like come on, man, that's not a good enough tax return. I'm going to say that I paid more in taxes. Yeah, exactly, they'll never catch me. That's such a good idea. I know why are more people not doing this?
Speaker 2:I heard on a podcast that people Hello, chandler, chandler.
Speaker 1:Okay, welcome back to another episode of the Trust Tree. This isn't actually a restart, but while we were recording, tater unhooked the thing, so we actually don't have any idea what we were talking about when we stopped recording.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Zeke made a good point that we could just say that I got like 10 percent worse because I just did that yeah, no kidding.
Speaker 1:So we'll override whatever tater score was, with tater getting 10 percent yeah, so as a group we got 30 percent worse 30 percent worse? Oh yeah, because it's a compounding multiple right, it's a compounding.
Speaker 2:Yeah to the power of three yeah, you hate to see that.
Speaker 1:So, anyway, we're going to move on to one of my favorite segments, which is Worst Hole of Golf. Not everybody has to play this segment, and if you don't like golf, we're going to do it anyway. Tater got to talk about tennis for like half an hour. I know, yeah, you guys should have come here way before that, and so we don't do this every single time, but I do want to throw it over to my friend Zeke.
Speaker 2:Maybe he could describe to us the worst hole of golf that he played. Maybe today I decided I don't want to play this. No, so we played Fossil Creek and par four and it's just like not a driver hole really. And then the green is quite elevated. There's just like a wall. In front of the green there's a creek with a creek short of it, it's a fossil fossil creek.
Speaker 2:The fall it might be. I haven't. I'm yet to see any fossils and I spent a long time around the Creek. I feel like I would have seen one or two T shot. I hit a three iron. That I want to say I hit great, but it was fine. I was in the middle of the fairway like 150 yards in dead downwind, doable yeah.
Speaker 3:So this is where things get tough.
Speaker 2:Let's all guess what he made from the middle of the fairway. Oh, okay, I'm going to guess eight. Good, thank you for your trust in me. You're wrong. You're wrong. 150 dead down wind. I tried to hit a little knockdown 9 iron.
Speaker 1:It was knockdown, it was very knockdown, it was a little knockdown If you want to hit the ball low, hit the equator of it.
Speaker 2:Ben calls it hitting it high on the ball. Yeah, you hit it a little high on the ball. I bladed a nine iron into the wall and then just dropped straight down into the water. So now I have to hit, like a weird almost flop shot, to get onto the green. You could have just hit the same shot. I could have and I should have we're going to find out, but I didn't.
Speaker 1:People keep him dragging home.
Speaker 2:He's hitting four.
Speaker 3:He's elected to hit a much more difficult shot, his choice.
Speaker 1:He can choose any yardage it's a pick your own adventure.
Speaker 2:So I have this 60-yard pitch that I have to hit 20 feet uphill.
Speaker 1:Important note behind the flag, there's a giant backstop. There is a giant backstop. Get as far past it as you want to.
Speaker 2:Not as far Was there a penalty area past the flag.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:Okay, so that's probably the miss.
Speaker 3:Yeah, for sure, let's hear what he does.
Speaker 2:Well, the first pitch shot I Do, you want to guess I'm guessing he dumped it in the water, that, but that's correct.
Speaker 1:But not just once and not twice either. Three times I hit it in the water, oh, wow, okay. So what's the math on that? No, I did only hit it in the water twice. Two more times.
Speaker 2:Three total. Okay, so he dropped four in five out.
Speaker 1:He hit four in five out, hitting six.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Repeat hitting eight, and then he hit his eighth shot onto the. How close was that, though. Was it nippy? It was nippy. It was nippy, it was a little bit flutie Pass the flag, zip it back a little bit.
Speaker 2:I probably had like six or seven feet for nine.
Speaker 1:Didn't even come close to scaring the hole. Oh, really, not even anywhere close to scaring the hole.
Speaker 2:No, and so I tapped in for ten, first double-digit hole I've had in a while. Comfortable six over par, yeah, and I was four over through five Not bad and then ten over through six.
Speaker 1:Tanner, I know you didn't play golf with us today, but did Zeke reach out to you at all during his round of golf?
Speaker 2:Boy. He was bragging early about going par. I was not bragging, although it turns out that was the best time to do it. I'll read the start. I was not bragging, although that was the best time to do it. I'll read the text. I just sent a picture of the scorecard and I said provocative start which it was.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's true, it was a provocative start.
Speaker 2:I was self-ejecting. I guess that's not really it. Early on, that's hot, thank you, I think there's that term. I know a different scientific term for that Self-ejecting.
Speaker 1:That's masturbation bro Alex, what was the worst old golf you played in the last month?
Speaker 3:I think it was when we were at Robson and I topped it off the tee box three times. Oh my god, like you re-teed it. Yeah, oh, man, because I topped it into a creek three times and Ben's like, after the first one, ben's like we can do give one to get one. I was like, all right do it again.
Speaker 3:I'm like he's like just do another one. I'm like we're playing a match. He's like giving me another free mulligan. I was a pity mulligan. I don't accept those. Yeah, yeah, um, so it was probably that one. I don't remember what else happened after. That hole is probably not good, but it was another day like today, where it was just Insanely windy. Yeah, it's been super windy and it wasn't like gusting like it was today, but it was heavy. Yeah, it was a heavy wind, like a steady 20, 25.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, but it felt like way worse. Also, the weirdest thing happened while we were, so we made the turn when we were playing at Robson last week and when we get to the 10th tee box, well it's they have three nines, so it's our 10th tee box, but it's the first hole of like the other nine holes. There's like like probably 15 golf carts like sitting on the on the hole and it's like a 550 yard par five, so seven golf carts no no, no, it was seriously.
Speaker 3:It was like a start of a tournament okay, damn.
Speaker 1:And we it's like a 550 yard par five. And so there we're, like what's going on here? And there's a starter there and she's like, oh, y'all making the turn, y'all go ahead of these people. And so it's clearly the start of a tournament. And so alex and I, I like I hit my t, we hit our t shots and then we start driving. It was car path only because it was super wet, we start driving, all the golf carts start following us like they're not teeing off from back there, and this just keeps happening until they this is again they're like waiting for you to play every shot.
Speaker 1:They have, like you know how, like little kids, like the cone drill that you do, they have those like little cones, like little tiny like. So we get alex, like I hit my third shot from like 110 yards on the green Not to brag Green in regulation and the Marshall sets up this golf hole for this tournament from like 60 yards. So they're playing a tournament, but the hole was from like 60 yards. It was a bunch of very old people.
Speaker 1:One lady was pushing a walker from her golf cart to the tee box. It's a game for everybody.
Speaker 3:Robson Ranch is like a 55-plus community. Oh really yeah, but they have a very sick golf complex.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it was a very interesting place to play golf.
Speaker 2:Really yeah, and everything was so cheap there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there were a lot of old people there.
Speaker 3:Were they hitting on y'all?
Speaker 1:Yeah, they were hitting on us regularly.
Speaker 2:Yeah, Wait what were you saying?
Speaker 3:Yeah, it was really cheap or not. The golf wasn't cheap, but I got a Bloody Mary and he got a double or something, and mine was five, his was eight, or something like that. Oh, wow, yeah, so 50 of them.
Speaker 2:Oh y'all, I brought $200. I'm spending all of it.
Speaker 3:Great club sandwich, Very difficult to get. Yes, we were in there for 30 minutes waiting for these club sandwiches and we get to our next hole and the guys are still on the tee box. That's infuriating. We've been getting stuck behind some crappy groups on the golf course lately.
Speaker 2:People suck at that. I was talking to Zach about this because he always has stories about people. Well, he had a story about people playing slow in front of them. Or no two guys played with him slow and it got to the point where they just left him. They were playing so slow.
Speaker 1:Wow, I hate slow. I made a double buggy on the first hole today. That was the worst hole of golf that I played.
Speaker 2:I watched some worse holes at Tierra Verde, yeah no yeah. I watched Ben Stubb like four chips. That was the first hole of the day.
Speaker 1:My golf game is like sneaking up on being decent again. It's like, hey, you might know how to do this, buddy. Like today I shot 40 on the front, nine, never even sniffed making a birdie.
Speaker 2:And then I I came home in 35, made three, three, three birdies in a 40 mile per hour then turns worse hole of golf into how good he is at golf classic. It was nice well I got.
Speaker 1:I, like if we were doing golf, if we're doing like better or worse for golf, like since the last time we recorded my, I've gotten a lot better for the record, he drew a line going up on his paper. We're trending in the right direction. Plus like 8-9%.
Speaker 3:I love trend lines.
Speaker 1:This is month over month.
Speaker 2:I hit two balls out of play at Teter-Vader on the same hole. Yeah, that'll get you. That was a lot of strokes. That was a super windy day too. I was self-ejecting. That was a super windy day too. I was self. What did you say Self-ejecting? I was self-ejecting all over the hole. I was taking myself out of the hole. I was self-ejecting left, and then I turned and I self-ejected right a little bit.
Speaker 3:Has anyone de-greened themselves lately?
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:No, I hit the same chip shot three times today on the first hole. Did you figure it out? After that, well then, I was just like. On the third hole, I was like, because I was short side, I was like, fuck it, I'm just going to hit it past the hole, like I should have on the first one. And then I made it like a 30-footer for six. It was like 18 feet. Zeke rolled it off. Zeke rolls it off, he lays down on the green.
Speaker 1:He knows how far he is. He knows how long he is from shoulder to shoulder, so he rolls it off to figure out how far.
Speaker 3:He does the worm. He knows exactly how many times he does the worm thing.
Speaker 1:Okay, I think we're going to get into now everyone's favorite recurring segment, the X-Files. And today, on the X-Files, I want to talk about X-Factors, and when I think of X-Factors, I think like, how cool would it be to have a fall guy? I don't understand how that's an X factor. What are you talking about? It's your get out of jail free card. It's an X factor. Okay, it's like us normal people if we get caught gambling like, and it's like illegal gambling, we're screwed. But if you're Shohei Itani, you have an X factor of like no, actually we just blame it on my translator. Now his translator's got fired. Have you all read about this?
Speaker 2:Have you heard about this?
Speaker 1:Have you heard about this?
Speaker 2:Yes, read on about it.
Speaker 1:Extra action Otani's in the definitely For those of you that don't know of our millions of listeners.
Speaker 2:basically, the way that the story is being presented is otani's translator.
Speaker 1:Um lost like five million dollars gambling illegally, um, and so he got fired because he was evidently stole money from otani or something like that. Anyway, all of the like, all the payments to the bookie, are all in otani's name, every single one of them. The wire transfers have his name on it, all that kind of stuff. It's like. The question is like for me at least, what I like. When I hear all that, I'm like oh no, otani is just doing that, and what do you guys think?
Speaker 2:okay. So yeah, because I read a whole, I read a espn had an article about it because I think they broke the story. Um, they were like okay, initially they were like the interpreter or the Ohtani's camp was telling them. Like the interpreter like went to Ohtani like hat in hand and was like I've made some terrible mistakes and I've run up $4.5 million in gambling debt, can you help me pay this off? And Otani just being the nice guy that he is, paid off all his debts and then just let him. Everything went back to normal with that. That was the initial story that they tried to sell.
Speaker 2:And then they tried to say Otani didn't know what was going on because the interpreter was telling him incorrect information. So like this interpreter that like supposedly paid off, that otani paid off all his debts, was then still the interpreter for, like everybody like dealing with this situation. So then he's like telling otani like wrong information that's. It's like a double shield kind of we're like, oh, he had no idea. Double didn't know it. Because, like we can't talk to him because the interpreter is telling him bullshit. But then it like, the more I think about, the more it probably was just so tawny it brings up an interesting point.
Speaker 3:It's hard to know the character of an interpreter because they're always just speaking what the person they're interpreting is, that you never get to know like more about them as a person right and like or how accurate they actually are interpreting what.
Speaker 2:That's a job that requires a lot of integrity.
Speaker 3:Because there's been lots of instances of fake sign language interpreters and those end up just being funny.
Speaker 1:I mean probably not for the deaf people. Yeah, exactly what language are?
Speaker 2:they signing in. He's like, LOL, they have no idea what's going on. Wing dings.
Speaker 1:Do you guys? Is there anybody in your life that you think could be a fall guy for you?
Speaker 3:There are a couple people that I know should be, should be willing to do it.
Speaker 2:I think I could be a good fall guy. I think that's really my role. Rather than having a fall guy, I could be the fall guy. You don't want to be a fall guy? I think that's really my role. Rather than having a fall guy, I could be the fall guy. There has to be some kind of compensation. He's probably getting money under the table after this.
Speaker 1:This is a good situation to be the fall guy on. I'm pretty sure he's just going to go back to Japan and just live his life.
Speaker 2:Otani's like hey, I did something bad If Otani did place these bets. That guy is now on the payroll for some undetermined amount of time, but probably making more than I'm making right now. Almost definitely yeah, but the problem is you have to be bilingual, which I'm not.
Speaker 3:I think Tater could be a good fall guy. He just admitted that he has nothing going on.
Speaker 2:Honesty, oh, you mean, I just have the time for it.
Speaker 3:Well, yeah, you said you didn't do anything in March. You have nothing going for you. You've got time to go to prison for a little while.
Speaker 2:I think he's going to go to prison. That's the thing You'd have to draw a line. If you're going to raise your hand to be the fall guy, you have to say this is what I'm willing doing it any time. I'm not going to be the guy that's holding the gun. I'm not made to go to prison, but I can be the guy that I didn't know I was allowed to gamble. You don't think you'd do well in prison? In some sense I would.
Speaker 3:I think if you just talked to someone about tennis for long enough, they'd probably just be like this guy's crazy. Stay away from that guy.
Speaker 2:I enough. They'd probably just be like this guy's crazy. Stay away from that guy. I'm missing the rise of Alcaraz right now.
Speaker 1:That guy's nuts.
Speaker 3:Have you ever seen his overhand smash? Dude, it'll give you nightmares, man.
Speaker 2:Not good. What situation do you envision yourself needing a fall guy, Ben?
Speaker 1:How seedy are you Are?
Speaker 2:you trying?
Speaker 3:to like is this your shark take? You're trying to get us to bid on Biggie or Fall.
Speaker 2:Guy, what's going on? Man, I want to convince you guys to try. You're the trustee I'm thinking about making.
Speaker 1:I'm thinking about buying some pretty shady stocks and I'm hoping one of you will let me do it in your name.
Speaker 2:That. I'm hoping one of you will let me do it in your name. That's what this is really about.
Speaker 3:So you're looking for a Martha Stewart type situation. Yeah, you have some inside information, but you want me to sign your memos.
Speaker 2:That's exactly right. I need you to buy the stock.
Speaker 1:I don't need you to buy the stock.
Speaker 2:I need you to find three other people that will buy the stock.
Speaker 3:And then if they sign up three people and then they sign up three, people, you of three people.
Speaker 1:You don't understand we could all be rich Once you make diamond. You don't understand. Once you're the diamond level, you're just printing money out.
Speaker 2:I feel like white collar crime doesn't ever get tried as hard as drug crime.
Speaker 1:All my crimes are white collar bro.
Speaker 2:Alright, then I'm down. I'll be your fall guy. What's my compensation package? Look like it's not great, it's really good.
Speaker 1:It's really good, there's no benefits. Oh yeah, we're not going to pay your health care.
Speaker 2:Not even Cobra, not even Cobra, not even Cobra.
Speaker 1:You don't want Cobra, no, but we do have a 1% match if you want to invest in the fund. Whatever you put into the fund, we match 1 percent. It's not that big.
Speaker 2:I mean it's not nothing once you put in 10k oh yeah, you have to cross that boundary like hey, let me ask you guys something like would you be bernie madoff?
Speaker 1:like if you could sign up for it, knowing how long he got to live like the big life.
Speaker 2:No, dude, come on, how many people burning me off really fucks people's lives up, a lot of people's lives up. So no, no definitely not.
Speaker 3:I saw alex eyes twinkle that guy lived the life for a while. No, yeah, that just inspired me, like you remember, like jump rope for heart back in. Oh, y'all were homeschooled, never mind yes, I remember it though you mean very cool.
Speaker 1:You guys were very cool actually sure you talk about your class breath, because I was number one in my class.
Speaker 3:I was number two in my class that's tough because a twin like what if you did like a bernie madoff scheme but you just like, did it to kids like jump rope for heart, like that had to be a scam. What's jump rope for heart? So, basically, like the idea behind it was, is that you like jump rope in front of like people your parents work with and they give you money and then that goes to like heart disease.
Speaker 2:Oh, so you're saying like anytime kids are selling chocolates to you at like for like a school?
Speaker 1:thing, yeah, I'm skimming like 50% off the top. Oh my God, it's like the Michael Scott thing where he wears like 50 off. My god, it's like the michael scott thing where he, uh, where he's like 25, but it's per mile, yeah, or yeah.
Speaker 3:Yeah, they get a lifelong core memory and I get 50 off the top. I don't see like yeah how can that be?
Speaker 2:I'm not seeing a problem, alex is like do the bernie madoff thing, but to kids that's like way worse it's not, though they've been.
Speaker 3:They're so stupid they have no idea what's going on. It's not like they're gonna be like traumatized by it.
Speaker 1:They don't have to recover from anything you're, you are jump rope for heart. That's what you're saying. It's like you're running, that you're selling the jump ropes to the kids. They're doing the jump rope.
Speaker 2:No, he's handling the funds that come in.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah who loses there Like who honestly loses.
Speaker 2:The cause. But no, but that is the cause.
Speaker 1:I don't think it's Alex's cause Jump rope for heart, but the heart is just.
Speaker 2:So you're just running a scam?
Speaker 3:Okay, yeah, it's just a scam, just do a scam. I mean I'll probably donate some of it, okay. I'm sure I'll feel like a little guilty and like whatever you donate down.
Speaker 2:Alex will donate 1% of that to an actual cause.
Speaker 3:Like every time I'm at a golf course and like the the hero challenges there I'll, I'll pay to play and I'll miss on purpose so they can keep it.
Speaker 1:That's cool to see that man.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:All right, I uh are you going to have a guy? I just want more money. I don't need my socks to goodwill.
Speaker 1:Do you wash them first? Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't.
Speaker 3:That's their job, Zeke. Why would you take that responsibility?
Speaker 2:Do they wash the clothes? You think that you'd at goodwill. You think they wash them yeah.
Speaker 1:I bet they have a big old giant. I don't know that's a lot of inventory.
Speaker 2:I don bill Might as well just be a laundromat at that point.
Speaker 3:They're not helping anyone at that point, Definitely not themselves which is all we care about.
Speaker 2:Do you guys think that?
Speaker 1:analytics belong in sports, and how deep should analytics?
Speaker 3:go in sports. Are we saying sports as a whole or like sport by sport basis? Because I think it's been proven that Moneyball was a great success. It was a really good movie. At least that's all that came out of it. It was a great success.
Speaker 2:It was a really good movie at least, that's all that came out of it.
Speaker 1:We did all learn that on-base percentage is way more important than batting average.
Speaker 2:We know that to be true now Right, well, they never won a World Series, so Well, sure, billy Beans does say his shit doesn't work in the playoffs and I think the Yankees are doing kind of a money ball thing too're trying to hit more home runs More of an analytics thing than try and get cheap players.
Speaker 3:The three true outcomes Right Well, Tater hates goalie analytics.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's true. I hate hockey analytics, I think, more than anything. Why do you hate hockey? I think hockey is like this sport.
Speaker 1:It's really hard to quantify.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think the thing that I said. Ben is super into trying to make Jake Andre look like the devil. I understand that he's trying to find any stat to back that up.
Speaker 1:Unfortunately, only all of the stats back that up.
Speaker 2:If you watch the game, though, he's not playing that bad. They're giving up a lot of really good looks and he's letting some of them in. I think that ship is turning. He's played better the last couple of games. I just think that all the analytic stats that Ben is bringing up terrible, terrible points that he continues to bring up they're only taking into account the location of the shot. They're not taking into account at all the quality of the shooter or the speed and quality of the shot.
Speaker 1:Let me ask this then how should we evaluate the goalie?
Speaker 2:You should just ask me if they're playing good, and I'll tell you you can't play good you know, what I just figured out you're Jake Ondra's fall guy yeah, I'm happy to be that I've been applying to that job consistently.
Speaker 1:Jake, I will sing your praises, really like what it really is.
Speaker 2:I can't live in a reality where Jake Ondra is the problem, and so I've decided.
Speaker 1:That's the thing. Nothing is the problem. You just need him to play better.
Speaker 2:Do they? Because they're in first place in Central.
Speaker 1:Do you feel confident going into the playoffs?
Speaker 2:Extremely. That's my guy.
Speaker 1:Zeke wants a goalie change.
Speaker 2:What do you think about analytics man? I?
Speaker 1:think that's the only way for us to watch sports is through math. Obviously I this is the thing I think about analytics. I think that sports are complicated and I think anything that can help me understand them better is will be helpful for me. Like I want to understand what's going on, like I it like when you say, oh, that was a good look. Like I have no idea if that was a good look or not, so I'm trying to figure out, like is there some level?
Speaker 2:you have no idea if it was a good look or not by watching the game you can't figure that out at all with the eye test.
Speaker 1:Oh my god, I think that I test like I. I usually use analytics to like verify what I'm looking at, and if it doesn't verify what I think I'm seeing, then I just throw that that's bad. But if it exactly matches with what I'm, what I'm, then that's good analytics.
Speaker 2:Anyway, building my own model I think that there's been a narrative that's been pushed by really our entire family, or everybody that's watching the stars that I interact with that Jake Ondrej has having a dog shit season and his stats are not as good as they were last year or whatever. I don't think he's like, I'm not worried about him, that's all I'm saying. I think that they're going to win the Stanley Cup and when they do and Jake Andreu plays awesome, you guys don't get to go to the parade you can't sit with us.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay, all right. Well, that was a good. I'm glad we talked about analytics today. That was good content I like golf analytics?
Speaker 3:Yeah, especially all this stuff where people are like they post on Twitter like a tour player on average hits it to like 25 feet from 100 yards out. That stuff makes me feel better. It's like why are you?
Speaker 2:a 10 handicap, getting mad that you can't hit a wedge to five feet every time.
Speaker 1:That's a good question. Why are you getting mad Zeke? I wasn't.
Speaker 2:Oh, that brings, me to my next question. Theximity to the hole once I got on, the green wasn't the problem. It took me four tries to hit a wedge on with the green to begin with, or like you missed like 50% of eight-footers or something or whatever.
Speaker 1:Yeah, players miss 50% of eight-footers, which is crazy, that is crazy.
Speaker 2:That brings me to my next question. Like, is golf actually fun? Oh, I think it can be. How often when you're playing?
Speaker 1:well, so rarely I actually think, like I mean, I've had a couple, couple rounds of golf this year that I have not enjoyed like they've been really hard, but I, for the most part, I have really enjoyed golf yeah, but I think you're like in the top like two percent of golfers, so like for the rest of the 98 actually one percent. Okay, but I don't know, is golf?
Speaker 2:fun for you. Sometimes it's nice. It feels like no most of the time, but like for like, maybe like four holes out of every round, I'm having fun.
Speaker 3:I guess I don't know. I've adjusted my expectations, though, yeah.
Speaker 2:I think golf, this is going to be rich coming from me, because this is for sure something that I struggle with. I'm sure that it is. But golf like the act of playing golf if you don't actually care about what your score is is fun. Yeah, because then you're just out there with three of your friends hitting golf balls and that's fun, kind of communing with nature. Yes, well, I am quite the Lewis and Clark fellow myself. Okay, I explored a lot of the golf course today.
Speaker 1:Oh, it was golf fun.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I love golf. Yeah, I do too. Even the days that I get mad or I'm like I could easily not play today, I'm still glad that I touched grass and got outside and getting the reps in so that I can have a better time when we go on the golf trips and stuff, because that is peak fun for me. I don't know if anything beats that, especially our big golf trips. I think my life almost revolves around golf. Can I play golf this?
Speaker 1:weekend. I think that when you're playing that much golf, golf is fun because you can like. I think if you're, if you play golf once a month, it can be hard for that one time a month that you play golf.
Speaker 3:You put too much stock on it. Yeah.
Speaker 1:It's like this is the be all, end all, but in reality, like even for tour players, like it's just trying to get hot at the right time, like no one can maintain a super never practicing. Then when you go out there and you suck, that's probably not very fun. But if you have the will to prepare to win, then golf is fun.
Speaker 1:It really all comes back to Bear Bryant. It does. Doesn't everything come back to Bear Bryant? If you flatten it, alright, well, I mean, I'm gonna. I think I'm done with this. Time is a flat circle. What else did anybody have? Anybody got any more subjects they want to cover?
Speaker 2:No, what's the biggest dump y'all have taken? I'm just kidding. Probably whatever was on the system for me today. Zeke answers honestly.
Speaker 1:Zeke answers honestly.
Speaker 2:Well, it was going to be Tuesday morning, but we had a late Thursday afternoon, one that I wasn't quite expecting. Let me, we had a late Thursday afternoon, one that I wasn't quite expecting. Let me look at my photo album. I'll let you know. Oh my God.
Speaker 3:Okay, is this a bad Stars fan? So I was at a game recently and there was a guy like two rows behind me. It was a game we got to be like six to two by the Devils and after four he was like get Jake out of there, get him out. They pulled him. He's like, yeah, Wedgwood, wedgwood, lets two more in. He's talking trash to Wedgwood from the 300s. I'm just like who are you rooting for, dude? That reminds me of.
Speaker 2:That is weird. Yes, I think that is a bad fan. That reminded me of Ben and I went to a game two Saturdays ago and the woman sitting behind us fucking hated Jamie Benn. Oh, she hated Jamie Benn she hated him so much.
Speaker 1:No one's ever hated Jamie Benn as much as I have.
Speaker 2:Well, she is paying his contract, so she did.
Speaker 1:I do think she was a season ticket holder because, like it was very clear that the people sitting next to each other, they were a gang of Jamie Benn haters, no, just this one woman.
Speaker 3:Just the one lady.
Speaker 1:I mean, it was voracious.
Speaker 3:Was it valid?
Speaker 1:I mean, I think Jamie Benn's been fine this year and I think they're asking him to do a very different role than what they were asking him to do last year. His job he is the shepherd. This year, Jamie Benn is the shepherd. He's supposed to bring Wyatt Johnston and now his other son, Logan Stanko, along with him. He's a little daddy, that's not an easy job, but he's producing fine. It helps a lot that he scored two goals in the last game in one minute, which is cool.
Speaker 1:It looks like he's playing it hard all the time this lady was like at one point she said that she could not wait until his contract ended and that there was no way in hell. The captain of 13 years. She's like I'm counting the days until his contract is over. And the other lady's like don't you think they'll re-sign him? And she's like Jim Nill would never re-sign somebody that performs like this.
Speaker 2:I mean, it's like he traded for Nilsson. He signed Sam Steele. We have guys on our team that work. I don't think we have to be upset about that.
Speaker 3:I have a couple questions. How old was this lady?
Speaker 1:Probably 60.
Speaker 3:60s or 70s, yeah, so Jamie banged her daughter.
Speaker 1:Don't.
Speaker 2:I cannot confirm that. I can't. Yeah, I can't.
Speaker 1:There's no possible evidence and never called her back.
Speaker 3:Was she a guilt? Was she kind of hot?
Speaker 2:I don't actually ever think I found out what she looked like.
Speaker 1:You never turned around, you couldn't turn around. This is the trust race.
Speaker 2:I really didn't. I never looked at her.
Speaker 3:I mean, did she have good bone structure?
Speaker 1:As I said, I never actually looked. I don't just try and try and voice was whiny. I'll tell you that it for sure. So yeah, her daughter's hot yes, is that what? You want me to say alex, I mean it confirms one thing her daughter's definitely a dallas girl, sure look, if I knew.
Speaker 2:One thing from her voice is like this woman sounded like she had a hot daughter.
Speaker 3:All right, thank you okay, yeah, okay, yeah, how hard was that Okay so my thing getting back to the actual point of the thing.
Speaker 2:I think that they're just like Ben with Jake Ottinger. They're just sports fans that want to shit on certain players, like at all times.
Speaker 3:Have you ever had someone like that on, like your home team, that you're like? I hate this person. Get them out of here yeah, ryan Suter.
Speaker 2:That's basically it, I'm trying to think of another one. You feel like that with Dak.
Speaker 1:No, I don't feel that way about Dak. We need Dak to be good. There are not enough quarterbacks out there. That's how I feel about Jake Laundry. There's plenty of goalies, it's not.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to think of any other Stars players that I hated. Alex Hemsky, which may have been before your time, used to do this thing where he would carry the puck through the neutral zone really fast and then, as soon as he got to shoot it, the puck would fall off his stick, and he also used a tiny stick. That was a pretty infuriating guy. Matthias Janmark any time that he got in on a breakaway X-Go.
Speaker 1:Yanmark anytime that he got in on a breakaway X goals must have loved Matias Janiart when he was playing for the Stars.
Speaker 2:But the actual expected goals, we all know is zero whenever he has a breakaway, and same with Ty DeLandria Anytime he has a breakaway. Those types of players I don't hate those players, but I just know that they're not going to do what we want them to do.
Speaker 3:I'm rooting for them still, but I don't understand the like let's rip this one particular player the entire game and let's be like he, almost like rejoiced that he sucked Right like yes.
Speaker 1:Like, just validate your own, I do not think I rejoice when Jake plays bad, because it usually results in a bad game.
Speaker 2:Can I say something going back to what you just said? Can I say something going back to what you just said? Yes, you can, alishemski. Going back to the Alishemski oh yeah, zeke bought an Alishemski.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that's a bit of Josh, josh hated.
Speaker 2:Alishemski so much more than Tater. So I ordered an Alishemski jersey off AliExpress and I bought it just so I could wear it to games that I went to with Josh. That's a good bit. He was number 83. Al Shemsky was like a guy who I know it was horrible, but he was like a guy that once you play a video game you score like a goal, like a really cool goal one time, and you try and do that same thing like every time you have the puck or every time you're close to scoring in a video game. And he did that. But just like with professional hockey, or like he would try and like skate really fast on the wing and then get to the same point where he's about to score and then barely touched, he loses. This, he loses the puck.
Speaker 3:Yeah, like I don't hate people because they're scared to be great, I just don't respect them right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I am terrified of being great and he doesn't's been proven.
Speaker 3:Well no, because we're all terrified to be great on the golf course. I think that's true, certainly. I mean that's why I'm an 11-painter, like when you pipe your drive like 280 right down the middle and then you just chunk the 100-yard approach shot.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I watched that a couple times today. Yeah, yeah, I'm good at at least one. Your round of golf today was like 12 holes of chaos, but there were like four or five holes where you played the hole exactly right, that's Alex, that's me.
Speaker 2:Fairway, center of the green, that's a two putts.
Speaker 3:I think that's the epitome of like a 10 to 12 handicap, or like an 8 to 12.
Speaker 1:Where it's, like yeah, I don't make 18 bogeys, I make some doubles.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you make six pars. I make two doubles and a triple every time I play golf.
Speaker 1:If I just didn't do that, I'm a five.
Speaker 2:You've learned the holes you're popping on too, yeah, which is good. I won some holes with double playing. Ben, that's true, I did not, Not today. No, Zeke did not. I don't think Ben made. Oh no, you doubled one.
Speaker 3:Oh no, you doubled one, I doubled one yeah, that was the only one doing it, the skill gap gets insanely large when the wind is really high.
Speaker 2:Ben is just a way better golfer at that point, yeah, you have to really know where the center of the face is, to play in 40-mile-an-hour winds.
Speaker 3:I know where it is.
Speaker 2:I can't hit the ball with it. That's my problem.
Speaker 1:Controlling trajectory is the biggest advantage.
Speaker 3:And self-ejecting At the right times. When I want to, I self-eject, yeah. When you self-eject with us, everyone's like why don't we just all write down par yeah, that sounds like a good idea. Who's governing this?
Speaker 2:A group self-ejectulation.
Speaker 3:But with Big as well. We self-eject Like double Double.
Speaker 1:Zeke was like no, I made 10.
Speaker 2:Dude, one time I was riding in the car with Jay and I was pretty sure Ben made double but he wrote down bogey and I was like this is why I'll never beat Ben. And then like three holes later I had gone like double, double bogey and then I sat down in the car and I was like actually, this is why Never sat down in the car and I was like, actually, this is why Never be bitten, oh man yeah.
Speaker 3:A pickle mistress that golf.
Speaker 2:Hey, has anybody taken any golf shoes?
Speaker 3:Yes, where are you going? I'm going to Santa Barbara for a wedding.
Speaker 1:You've been going to a lot of weddings.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I thought we were past that. And then going to Alabamaama playing some trail courses, playing purcell farms, excited to get that apple on the first hole and then watermelon on the fifth and uh, yeah, they hand that out from the farm oh, they have like fresh apples on the first tea box and then that, that par three. That's like a 10 story drop. On the way down you can grab watermelon from the cooler. Okay, I didn't know that. And so now what you said makes a lot more sense.
Speaker 3:Sorry, I've been watching so much purcell farms.
Speaker 1:It's just like, oh, this is common knowledge for everyone I played at the world golf hall of fame a few years ago and they the king and the bear is one of the courses out there. And, um, they have like a old-fashioned barrel full of apples on the first day, like an actual barrel.
Speaker 3:I don't even like apples like that, but I'm gonna eat an entire apple. What kind of apples are they?
Speaker 1:they're green the granny smith. Yeah, granny smith's a vastly superior apple for me.
Speaker 3:I like tart things I like, I like a honey crisp, I'm a honey crisp boy, honeycrisp boy. Give me them GMOs.
Speaker 2:Taylor's over here, like I thought they were just greeted right there are no organic Honeycrisps because they're grown in a lab.
Speaker 3:What? Yeah, they're genetically mutated to be the perfect apple.
Speaker 1:That's crazy man, I think Harvard made it Speaking of scientifically mutated. Have you had the grapes that taste like cotton candy?
Speaker 3:Yes, no, no, some old guy walked around the knock handing them out and I was like, thank you.
Speaker 1:Then Alex just passed out. Yeah, don't remember much. Okay, all right. Well, I think that's going to do it for us this week. Thanks everybody for tuning in. Sorry for the disconnected nature of this one, because Tater literally disconnected the microphone at one point in the middle of this podcast.
Speaker 3:I think, as everyone heard, march has just been a month of absolute chaos for everyone. We're looking forward to April, when things speed up even more and get even more chaotic. Alright, we'll be back.
Speaker 1:Go stars oh my gosh.